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Damnut
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 01:52 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted,
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied,
"You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."
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New12r
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 01:53 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

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No_rice
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 01:56 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

lmao
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Spiderman
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 02:10 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Spidey was in a hot air balloon and realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted,
"I CAN SEE DOWN YOUR SHIRT FROM UP HERE!"


Fixed it for ya : )
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No_rice
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 02:21 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

i just about spit out my orange juice spidey! that sounds exactly like something i would say too. just ask Jenn!
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Xl1200r
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 02:27 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Being a Management student at a primarily engineering school, I've heard a lot of these jokes, and they're all good.

But the bottom line is, when's the last time an engineer fired a manager? : )
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Djkaplan
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 03:25 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

This reminds me once when management said my entire office had to take a seminar about sexual harrassment.

At the end of the day, we all concluded the way we conducted ourselves was fine, but we decided the word 'harrass' should never be used lest it be misconstrued.

Management didn't get it... the humor I mean.
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Buelltoys
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 03:26 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I am both a manager and an engineer and that one even made me laugh.
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Ft_bstrd
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 03:59 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Reminds me of when my boss hired a motivational speaker to come in.

His main point was that there was a perfect place for everyone. If you weren't happy where you are, you need to pursue the position that you will enjoy.

Within a month, 75% of us were gone. : D
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Cityxslicker
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 04:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Thats motivation for ya;) Was in an insurance office with a Broker that was my age when Office Space came out. He was such a twerp. I recommended fridays be Hawaiian casual. All the staff had seen the movie, he was clueless. I had to leave once he started talking like Lumburg. I just couldnt take the guy seriously . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2ApklEuYpo
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Doerman
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 04:55 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Techie joke....
After having dug to a depth of 30 feet last year, New York scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed, California scientists dug to a depth of 60 feet, and shortly after, headlines in the LA Times newspaper read: 'California archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper wire and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the New Yorkers.'

One week later, the 'Mining Journal', a local newspaper in Duluth, MN, reported the following:

'After digging as deep as 90 feet in a rocky field near Esco MN, Ole Johnson, a self-taught archaeologist and Swedish logger, reported that he found absolutely nothing. Ole has therefore concluded that 300 years ago, Minnesota had already gone wireless.'
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Djkaplan
Posted on Monday, March 10, 2008 - 04:55 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Lumburg... I was just talking about that character today when I saw an over-officious manager making a big deal about nothing (not TPS cover sheets).

I loved that flick... it really struck a nerve with me.
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