| Author | Message | ||
     Boney95 |
Just had a buddy/co worker commit suicide. What the fuq is that about. The most selfish thing you could do... This is the 3rd suicide that I've seen/dealt with. Crazy Sh!t!!! | ||
| Froggy |
Until you have been down that road, you couldn't possibly understand what was going through his head. Its not fun anyone involved. I'm sorry for your loss. | ||
| Wolfridgerider |
Permanent solution to a temporary problems... sorry for your loss I can't tell you how much it pisses me off.... my wifes side of the family has had to deal with this issue.... I cant tell you what a wonderful daughter he didn't get to see grow up. | ||
| Roadcouch98 |
I am sorry to hear about Your Friend(s). I would Hope for Your sake that You are a Spiritual Person, as this is one of Life's Times of Greatest need. I will say God Bless You and to the Families of Your Friend, also. Some people just absolutely cannot get out of bed anymore to Face yet another Day of the downward Spiral. Others are not able to find the Help and the Peace of Mind to get back into their former lives. Mental Illness is as Serious as ANY disease, but is looked at with Shame and misunderstanding, which only makes it easier to take that way out. | ||
| Brettx1 |
Sometimes these situations are caused by chemical imbalances in a person, that are hard to detect. My cousin committed suicide, his sister was the one diagnosed with depression and she was getting help for it, he on the other hand seemed to be the normal one. He had a few problems going on but nothing I would consider a reason to end your life, it will always be question in my mind if he ignored his possible depression, I guess I'll never know. He left two beautiful little girls behind and that saddens me the most, I'm glad his sister got help, she's doing great. I guess what I'm getting at is, outward appearances can't tell you what's going on in the inside. I'm truly sorry for your loss. | ||
| Blake |
Lost a good friend of mine to suicide last year about this time. Some of you may remember him as he rode his bike over from Indiana to join Keith (Skully) and me at the Buell 25th Anniversary Homecoming. I still haven't removed his entry from my phone. Don't want to. An older cousin killed himself when he was a teenager. I know two other friends who had close family commit suicide. Life can really knock a person down and crush them. | ||
| Indy_bueller |
Life can really knock a person down and crush them. Yes it can. You can't always tell who needs help, but a kind word or deed can make all the difference in the world to someone who is struggling. I'm sorry for your loss. | ||
| Hex |
We don't have all the details yet, but my nephew's dad just did himself two weeks ago. Sorry for your loss, and ours as well. To the living, keep on keeping on...Love to all. | ||
| P47b |
I went thru the same thing with 3 coworkers. All three are long stories. It's something that I will never understand. It's even harder when the plan it out and tell you they are leaving. Sorry for you loss. | ||
| Nevrenuf |
sorry for your loss and your friends family loss. i dealt with depression quite a bit when i was younger but was always afraid to make that move to do anything about it until i decided to make the move to get professional help. and over the years i have spent a good bit of time in a shrinks office. luckily, i have a great wife,kids, granddaughter and the motorcycles that keeps me loving life now. thoughts and prayers are with you boney. | ||
| Swordsman |
Jeez P47b, where the hell do you work?! My cousin dated a girl that was separating from her husband. He was unstable (part of the reason for the split), and that was just enough to push him over the edge. As a final "FU", he shot himself. The really bad part is that they had 3 kids together, all rather young. Selfish son of a bitch right there... hated his wife more than he loved his children. ~SM (Message edited by Swordsman on March 10, 2010) | ||
| No_rice |
I still haven't removed his entry from my phone. Don't want to. ive got two friends like that in my phone. one killed him self after we were out one night. told me he was done, didnt want to do it anymore. i told him to shut the f up and go home and i'd talk to him in the morning. never got to. i was the last person to see him and thats the last thing i said. sucks  i work with his sons grandpa at my shop in iowa. the son is sooo much like his dad was. its hard to watch. the other one was a girl i used to know. her and her bf had been split for awhile and she ended up staying with me one night. next day her ex ends up chasing her down the highway outside of town with there kid in her car. runs her off the road and has a semi end up on top of her. kid barely got a scratch. she got pinned and died. it was only hours after she left my house... i also have had more then my fair share of highschool friends commit suicide within a couple years. 2 of which lived directly across the street from me. different houses different familys... one shot himself in the basement, and the other hung himself in the garage. everyday i looked at those houses when i walked out my door and that would creep into my mind. i'd grown up with both of them. i moved... there was just a bad vib there i couldnt get away from. i just keep thinking thats the easy way out. i cant ever say things like that havent crossed my mind. ive been through some really crappy stuff over the years. but alot of people i know think im a completely stubborn sumbitch, never gives up on anything. that is like the ultimate give up and i still have never reached a point were i can convince myself id be ok with giving up. | ||
| Hmartin |
I still have a suicide note from a close family member that reads, "Anyone who says this is the coward's way out is full of sh!#. But it's time to go." He wrote that note, then went outside and shot himself in the chest so we wouldn't have to have a closed-casket funeral. He knew I loved him, that I'd give him the shirt off my back, perhaps more. And it wasn't enough. You can't know what's going through the mind of someone who's so depressed and hurting so badly inside. You just can't. Edit: Perhaps I should expound a little bit. Perhaps this will help you; perhaps not, but I feel compelled to add that, in my case, and perhaps yours, too, I think he thought he was doing us all a favor. He had worked himself up into thinking that he'd not only end his problems, but keep us from draining our wallets / resources / energy in order to help him through his tough situation. Fact is, none of us would've hesitated to help him, and we offered - several times. I can't count how many times I asked, "Tell me what you need." When a family member needs help, what do you do? You do what it takes. Instead, he thought leaving us out of it was the best thing. He couldn't have thought about the grief he would bring to us, or the financial mess to clean up, or dealing with lawyers, collection agency vultures, death taxes... By the way, that was precisely 1 year ago today, in fact. (Message edited by hmartin on March 10, 2010) | ||
| Nevrenuf |
there are people like my little sister who fought for every second of her life before dieing of cancer and you wonder how they do it then there are those who can't handle life and just give up and you wonder how they do that. no rime or reason. | ||
| Sifo |
I've dealt with it from 2 co-workers, a friend and a family member. Three of those I will never understand. The other had terminal cancer and a lot of pain ahead. The one with cancer I had never known to be a coward about anything. It's always tough to deal with. There was one more that died in a single vehicle accident on her motorcycle. If she hadn't claimed that an earlier accident was a suicide attempt I wouldn't question it as an accident. With that knowledge of the previous accident I really don't know what to think. | ||
| 86129squids |
Hate to hear of this, folks... My GF has been married twice, lost the first husband to a car wreck in which I think she was driving, both kids in the back- lost the 2nd husband when he killed himself. Just this year I managed to help her finish paying the IRS for back taxes from that mess. Stupid, selfish, it created a giant steaming turd for those left behind, and we just now flushed the damn thing this month. I can think of very few instances in which suicide would be a viable option, except to avoid a certain/miserably painful/ludicrously expensive demise... My GF's kids are grown up now, doing good, but losing two father figures had to have been hellish... On a side note, today my stepdad had to put down his and my mom's tiny poodle, Sunny- now that my mom's been gone just over a year, he's gonna be in alone, in a real tough place for a while- please think of him in your prayers... Let's all of us truly appreciate and love our time together on this lil blue marble... Peace. PS- Thanks again, Blake, I fixed the original post. Keepin it simple, stupid me... (Message edited by 86129squids on March 10, 2010) | ||
| Pwnzor |
For all of those who are left behind when a loved one makes this desperate choice... I've said a little prayer. Not much else we can do besides mitigate the financial and emotional damage left behind. It's selfish, unfair and just plain ugly. Peace be with you, everyone. | ||
| B00stzx3 |
Can't remember the exact quote..but it was something to the effect of suicide happens when your pain outweighs your mechanisms for dealing with pain. | ||
| Sknight |
I've dealt with a few people that have tried/commited the act. My 15YO daughter is dating a guy that tried three times and is now in counseling for this. We didn't have the typical talk. He did walk away pale as a sheet, and no I didn't threaten him. I'm really sorry you have people around you doing this. They don't seem to grasp the raw pain they're causing people. | ||
| Rainman |
It's hard to understand until you've been there. There are times when people are just tired of the chore of life because "life goes on long after the thrill of living is gone." Some have "It's a Wonderful Life" moments when they realize they are worth more dead than alive. Life is hard on them. I've had several close friends or spouses of friends kill themselves. I don't believe it's easy but that they just couldn't take it anymore. They don't see the pain they'll cause others because they can't get past their own intense pain. Don't hate them. Feel for them and those they left behind. And, should any of you seriously consider it, remember it's final and there's so much you'll never do ever again, including ride your Buell. That ought to make living worthwhile. | ||
| Hex |
Is suicide only a human condition? I'm trying to think of one animal besides us which deliberately kills itself. I know of stampedes and lemmings, but that's accidental. The male Mantis is devoured during mating, but that's procreation, different again. Animals do wonder off to die, but that's a natural end of life activity. Anyone? | ||
| Froggy |
Hex - some good reading http://news.softpedia.com/news/Do-Animals-Commit-S uicide-63441.shtml | ||
| Drkside79 |
I can really only understand suicide as respectable option when death is unavoidable anyway. ie cancer, illness and so on. | ||
| Hex |
Thanks Frogger. I've seen chickens act very disturbed when one of their mates got run over in our parking lot. They recognize death immediately, and try to help the dying, but as soon as it was over, they go on and leave the body and commotion behind. I suppose those animals who mate for life will stop eating when their mate dies and other situations. There is some great stuff here on Wiki (I'm with Camus being of the absurd type): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philosophy_of_suicide | ||
| Hex |
There are some good arguments for suicide in that Wiki article as well. Philosopher and psychiatrist Thomas Szasz goes further, arguing that suicide is the most basic right of all. If freedom is self-ownership—ownership over one's own life and body—then the right to end that life is the most basic of all. If others can force you to live, you do not own yourself and belong to them. Japan has a form of suicide called seppuku, which is considered an honorable way to redeem oneself for transgressions or personal defeats. It was widely accepted in the days of the Samurai and still practiced by some in Japan. This reflects a view of suicide as brave and correct rather than cowardly and wrong. | ||
| Aesquire |
I've been depressed enough to want to kill myself. It was more situational than chemical.....probably. Sucked and the thing that got me through was the thought of my family and how unfair it would be. Darn close though, and if the chemicals in my head had been different.... you might not be reading this. I have no answers, except to urge those with problems to just ask for help. The thing you have to remember is it's not your fault. I've beaten myself up for "not being there" for a bud who killed himself. I'm wrong to do so, I know, and my attitude swings between being royally pissed at him for the act & pissed at me for not seeing it... We hadn't talked in a few weeks & I get a call from another friend.. how can you not think about how it would have been different if only??? So, you keep a little more aware, and carry on... |
