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Danger_dave
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 07:46 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks." The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.
The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The old man replied, "No problem at all, Pastor." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the pastor.
The pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!" said the pastor.
The pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?" "No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied sadly.
"What happened?" inquired the pastor.
"My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."
"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the pastor.
"We know," said the young man, "We're not welcome at Hardware Store anymore either."

---------------------

Originally posted a link to The medal yarn.
http://www.davidcohen.co.nz/story1.htm
but I forgot I already had so insterted a good gag.

(Message edited by danger_dave on April 14, 2007)
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Wile_ecoyote
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 07:59 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

You earned that and much respect from me. It seems alot of folks wouldnt have lifted a finger.
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Nevrenuf
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 08:22 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

yep, remember that one a couple months ago and like i said then, timing is everything. just a shame it didn't end like you want it to.
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Danger_dave
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 08:30 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Yeah - thought I might have - apologies. Inserted a joke too.

killing time between a double header of rugby league games.

And thanks Wile.

(Message edited by danger_dave on April 14, 2007)
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Bcordb3
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 11:39 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I thought one would drink massive amounts of beer between rugby games!

Now that is a crazy game.
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Danger_dave
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 06:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

It is - we have 4 codes of 'football' in this part of the world. Plus I get 2 NFL games live in season.



(Message edited by danger_dave on April 14, 2007)
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Danger_dave
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 06:21 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Rugby League would be interesting to merkin's if it was explained to you right.
http://nrl.com.au
it's 80 minutes of non stop, no-huddle ofence and the ball is snapped (played) every few seconds.

It has many of the aspects of NFL, no helmets and a frenetic pace.

AFL is the most popular (no not 'Arena' - Australian Football League) - this is essentially Irish or Gaellic football played with an egg shaped ball. A game of running punt kicks and jumping contests. The athletes wear even less. Shorts, singlet mouthguard and full body contact. Hits occasionally NFL style too.
Check the 'best of' vids.
www.afl.com.au

Rugby Union is similar to Rugby league but until recently was an amateur code and has different rules and following.
Religion in NZ. Like the superbowl every time the 'All blacks' play.

This is what happens at the start of the games:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xQGUAE--rb0

I think that's the best bit. Get that up ya' Ray Lewis.

And then there is soccer. Which is reasonably health - but in a sad state globally. Stopped watching it.

Then there's basketball.

No wonder I have no time for fiction any more.

(Message edited by danger_dave on April 14, 2007)
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Kdan
Posted on Saturday, April 14, 2007 - 06:35 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I have a white water kayaking T-shirt. It says; "most sports require only one ball."

I used to watch AFL football in Canada. That's a sick game.
Still a Soccer fan, but now it's mostly watching my girls play high school ball. Not much for watching sports on TV.
Hell we have a golf channel over here. I couldn't imagine what kind of brain activity it takes to watch golf on TV.
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Xbullet
Posted on Sunday, April 15, 2007 - 08:51 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

....tee shot........Tiger Woods.............
......................sand wedge............
.....where's my drool bib?..................
.........
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Sparky
Posted on Thursday, April 19, 2007 - 01:59 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

This just in:
Harley riders, listening to World Superbike racing on the radio, are finding a WSBK contender they can identify with...



HOGa
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Danger_dave
Posted on Thursday, April 19, 2007 - 02:43 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

nor a yookie word was spoken.
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