Can I get brain on drugs sunny side up, with a six strips of bacon, stuffed hashbrowns, a side of biscuits and gravy, and knock it back with a six shot of espresso to clear the arteries?
I hate that pot smokers get their own day, but people who shoot up heroin get nothing. It takes a lot more dedication to be a heroin junkie than it does to burn a doob once in a while.
Taoism- Shit happens. Confucianism- Confucius say, "Shit Happens." Calvinism- Shit happens because you don't work hard enough. Buddhism- If shit happens, it really isn't shit. Seventh Day Adventist- No shit on Saturdays. Zen- What is the sound of shit happening? Hedonism- There's nothing like a good shit happening. Hinduism- This shit happened before. Mormon- This shit is going to happen again. Islam- If shit happens, it is the will of Allah. Moonies- Only happy shit really happens. Stoicism- This shit is good for me. Protestantism- Let the shit happen to someone else. Catholicism- Shit happens because you are BAD. Hare Krishna- Shit happens rama rama. Judaism- Why does this shit always happen to US? Zoroastrianism- Shit happens half the time. Christian Science- Shit is in your mind. Atheism- Sheeit. Existentialism- What is shit anyway? Rastafarianism- Let's smoke this shit.
"Marijuana plant. Scientists have just shown that one of Bob Dylan's most famous lines--"everybody must get stoned"-- is correct. That's because they've discovered that the brain manufactures proteins that act like marijuana at specific receptors in the brain itself."
"Hey man what's in this shit man?" "Mostly Maui Wowi man. But it's got some Labrador in it." "What's Labrador?" "It's dog shit." "What?" "Yeah my dog ate my stash man. Had it on the table and the little muther ate it. So I had to follow him around with a little bag for three days 'fore I got it back. Really blew the dogs mind." "You mean we're smokin' dog shit man?"