| Author | Message | ||
     Crusty |
Hang in there, Jaime. Out of the worst things that have happened to me, something really good has been the direct result. If you've had a succession of bad years, you may be about to hit a run of really positive years. Also; don't let the string of negatives stop you from seeing the positives. I'm sure there are many that are being overshadowed and possibly ignored. | ||
| Jaimec |
Never underestimate the effectiveness of "Purr Therapy." It's been helping me through this for sure. | ||
| 86129squids |
Dude... pets!! Do you have a fish aquarium? I've kept freshwater tanks, fish all my life, since childhood. I'll post up a pic later of my new 39 gallon bow front. Just set it up yesterday, getting ready to hang lithographs tomorrow. (Just re-did the living room.) Few things are more meditative, soothing than a good fish tank. "Overfilter, and underpopulate".  | ||
| Jaimec |
My father kept fish. After he passed away we eventually got rid of the aquarium. Dogs and cats were far more responsive pets and cats are better suited to those of us who work full time and don't have anyone home to care for pets during the day. When I first moved out of my mother's house, she kept her two cats and I got the dog. I loved that big teddy bear but I quickly learned how unfair it was for her that I not only worked all day but my company sent me across the river making my 15 minute commute into a two hour ordeal. When I got home I always came home to a MESS and I couldn't get mad at the poor dog because it wasn't her fault. I spent a LOT of money on carpet cleaner and deodorizer in those days. Didn't help that my next door neighbor said he could hear her crying and howling when I wasn't home either.  | ||
| Thumper74 |
I hate this type of stuff. My dad passed away Sept 23, 2013 and they still call for him/about him weekly. They won't take 'No' or 'He passed away 8 years ago' for an answer. It's a kick in the balls and semi-frequent reminder that he's gone. | ||
| 86129squids |
Yeah, separation anxiety. My first Basenji would destroy something of mine every time I went to work. I FINALLY learned, from a nice lady in Oak Ridge, that crate training was imperative. After that, my boy Loki and I did well for the whole 17 and a half years I had him. Prior to that, I had two female cockatiels. Overall, probably the easiest and most rewarding companion animals. They kept each other company in a large parrot cage, until I let them out. Pets, out of cage, or furniture. Yeah, a bit messy, but nothing like cats or dogs. Very personable, and simple fun. I just had to get used to birds flying randomly, maybe landing in inopportune places. Like a Christmas cake batter, early on when my stepdad first married my mom. Or, my girlfriends.... not cat, butt. Yeesh. Maybe a koi pond... (Message edited by 86129squids on August 30, 2021) (Message edited by 86129squids on August 31, 2021) | ||
| 86129squids |
  | ||
| Aesquire |
I always wanted a nice medium sized aquarium. Colored gravel, some cats eye marbles, a big fairy palace with multiple hiding places, the treasure chest with the bubbler, the clam with the pearl that opens & closes, the water wheel, wrecked pirate ship, and the diver that goes up & down, maybe a diving bell. And when guests come over, I'd flip a switch and the lights would come on and the show begins. If anyone asks where the fish are, I'd just say they are shy & hide when people come over. For the rest of the visit they will keep checking out the tank to try and catch the fish peeking out. | ||
| Jaimec |
For a short time we had this self-sustaining environmental aquarium. It had plants and a beta. The idea was the plants oxygenated the water (though betas can live in low-oxygen environments since they can gulp air directly from the surface). The fish's waste would fertilize the plants. All we had to do was feed the beta (and be very careful not to OVERfeed it). We had it for a few years until the fish passed away and then we never replenished the tank. The cat would stare at the fish for hours but thankfully never did anything more than that. My wife always referred to the beta as "Harry's pet fish." | ||
| Zac4mac |
A pet is a great help after the loss of a spouse. I adopted a shelter cat a couple of months after I became a widower. At first all I noticed was he walked funny, the shelter told me he had a medical issue. He did, just not what they thought. Realized finally that he has wobbly cat syndrome. More entertaining than any other pet I’ve had. Except for days like today, woke me up at 5:30, hollered at me for a few minutes then curled up for a nap. | ||
| Jaimec |
Just when you think things can't get any worse I just learned a childhood friend of mine just passed away. His sister is the one who performed our wedding ceremony and gave the eulogy at my wife's funeral. And now her kid brother died from cancer. At the time it was detected, it was already too late to do anything about it... | ||
| 86129squids |
Man oh man. Sounds like you've got lots of great people of great spirit... and we all must pass, we all are mortal. DANG I hate to hear of this. DANG it man. The burdens will never get lighter... but, maybe. We just, must, gather strength, and grace, as we walk. I see a pattern, Jaime. Things seem to be, and are, hammering you fiercely. Turn to me, turn to your friends, we've got you. We depend on one another. | ||
| Jaimec |
Denise was apparently captured this past Spring by the Google Street View camera. I was just looking at my house and found this. That's her car in the driveway.  | ||
| 86129squids |
Well... I guess there IS a reason folks wanted Bezos, et al, to just ride their rocket. We little folk just get photographed by robots. Science fiction, indeeed. The thing is, you'll have to look forward, and back, and then again. Bullshiteeey like this, will happen. And yeah, that's BS. Sorry you saw that. (Message edited by 86129squids on September 02, 2021) | ||
| 86129squids |
Talk about a fierce love. Also, the pain. I speak as a gemini. And, friend. | ||
| Jaimec |
She was captured doing what she loved; tending to her plants. Everyone in the neighborhood knew her because if it wasn't raining she would be out there puttering around her beloved plants. It's no surprise the Street View camera captured her. She was still alive when we first noticed this and she got a real kick out of it. She was also glad they "fuzzed" her face because she really did hate being photographed in the latter years of her life. She gained a LOT of weight due to the prednisone she had to take to control her RA inflammations and those bastard dentists NEVER gave her the teeth implants she'd been waiting for YEARS. | ||
| 86129squids |
Hey Jaime! Do holler. | ||
| Jaimec |
It's getting a little easier. My eyes still leak (a lot) from time to time but I'm not having the complete wracking sobs that go on seemingly forever anymore. One day at a time... I was expecting to hear the results of her autopsy by now, as I was told it would take up to three months due to the pandemic. My estate lawyer gave me the phone number for the County Medical Examiner and when I called them I was told they're now up to four to six months! So my Christmas present this year may be learning why my wife died. I figured there would be an autopsy as soon as she was declared. When a person dies for no apparent reason and her body is covered in bruises and scratches I figured it would be procedure. I was actually surprised I wasn't taken in for questioning! The YEARS of being on prednisone made her skin the consistency of tissue paper. She would get skin tears from the slightest abrasions and the fact that she was on anti-clotting medication only made it worse. Every time she got a new doctor they'd ask her if she needed someone to call Adult Social Services for her! She would wear long sleeved shirts and long pants whenever she went out in public because she didn't want people getting the wrong idea. I am NOT looking forward to this holiday season AT ALL. (Message edited by jaimec on September 17, 2021) | ||
| 86129squids |
Hey. A VERY good post here, glad to hear this!!! I just posted to The Crusticle's thread... here's one for you. | ||
| Jaimec |
Neither my wife nor I are Jewish (but we have two sisters-in-law who are). A Jewish friend just posted this Yom Kippur prayer and my eyes are leaking again.  | ||
| Damnut |
Hey Jaime..... My sincere condolences. I am not on here as much as I'd like and just got to reading this post. Hope you find some comfort in the support you have been receiving. I think that Stamford meeting was the one where I showed up on my S3 with an XB engine on the back? | ||
| 86129squids |
WZUP, Jim!  | ||
| 86129squids |
Jaime- that was a great Yom Kippur saying. Thanks for sharing. | ||
| Jaimec |
Yup. I'll NEVER forget that! | ||
| Jaimec |
FINALLY some good news for a change. I just found out I won't be alone for the holidays after all. My niece has been living down in North Carolina and she's MISERABLE there. The lease for her apartment is up next month and she wants to come back to New York but she doesn't have any place to stay. She was originally going to move in with her boyfriend but says things aren't "settled yet." She wondered if she could live with me for a couple of months. Of course I JUMPED at that! I really wasn't looking forward to the holiday season at all but now I am! It'll be great to have someone who answers when I speak to them for a change. Harry is a good listener but doesn't say much. If Denise hears me, she hasn't given me any sign... | ||
| 86129squids |
Fantastic news! Keep us posted. Nothing like family to carry us through. | ||
| 86129squids |
Fantastic news! Keep us posted. Nothing like family to carry us through. | ||
| Damnut |
Look at what I dug up. The looks I got were hilarious. The wheelies I was able to do were sometimes scary, my front end was a bit on the light side.  | ||
| 86129squids |
Who's that young whippersnapper messing with a Buell? Hmmm. Great! pic, Jim. That should definitely be framed. God we're a bunch of nutters. Nutter from another mudder. Wow. I do remember you telling us that story, my friend. I love you guys! | ||
| Jaimec |
IIRC, I'm the one that snapped that photo, Jim! Because I couldn't BELIEVE what you had strapped to that luggage rack... |
