| Author | Message | ||
     Slaughter |
From the Manitoba Herald: The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The Republicans winning the Senate is prompting an exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and live according to the Constitution. Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, global warming activists, and "green" energy proponents crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Southern Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota . “The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?" In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields, but they just keep coming. Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into electric cars and drive them across the border where they are simply left to fend for themselves after the battery dies. "A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single bottle of Perrier drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though, and some kale chips." When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and study the Constitution. In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half- dozen young vegans in blue-hair wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age," an official said. Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage, buying up all the Barbara Streisand c.d.'s, and renting all the Michael Moore movies. "I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?" | ||
| Pwnzor |
Good stuff! | ||
| Bob_thompson |
Excellent and it makes me want to buy or rent the biggest capacity bus and start transporting them from any large south of the border city to anywhere north of the border just to get rid of them. They think they are the are the intellectuals and most were awful stupid when it came to the latest elections. The re-education idea would never work due to lack of listening and comprehension. They usually do things from ideology and hate. And as far as assimilating them into our (conservatives) way of life, there is not enough pot in all of Oregon, Washington, Colorado or even Mexico to do that. As always I write this with a tongue in cheek but it just might be pretty close to correct; at least that the way it seems. Now where the heck are my rolling papers? HA! | ||
| Froggy |
I know someone else who had a similar idea  But it doesn't sound like you want to kill anyone, so how about we just reopen those internment camps the Japanese were sent to during WW2? Then again if we do that we lose out on all that potential labor, so we should just chain them all up and have them work on the fields. | ||
| Spiderman |
They usually do things from ideology and hate Remind me again how that marriage equality thing is going again? Oh yeah ancient ideology.... | ||
| Hootowl |
"ancient ideology" No. Ancient definition. | ||
| Hootowl |
"I know someone else who had a similar idea" Really? Hitler was helping Jews leave the country because they wanted to? The gist of the joke above seems to be that liberals are fleeing of their own free will. Helping them flee by renting transportation for them is not at all akin to what Hitler did. Liberals, you're two for two for missing the mark in this thread. | ||
| Sifo |
Godwin's law. Sometimes it kicks in early. | ||
| Froggy |
Yea, the Jews left on their own free will too. They just didn't want to learn how to concentrate at the concentration camps, just like the liberals in the "joke" above don't want to be brainwashed and poisoned. | ||
| Reindog |
Good one, Steve. Liberals have no sense of humor. | ||
| Froggy |
Very easy for it to kick in when discussing conservative ideals. | ||
| Hootowl |
Interesting observation, given that Nazism is diametrically opposed to American Conservatism. On the other hand, it (National Socialism) has a lot in common with modern American Liberalism/Progressivism (Socialism/Communism). | ||
| Hootowl |
Oh snap! Did I just compare Liberals to Nazies? | ||
| Reepicheep |
Nobody can do bigotry and intolarance like big government can do bigotry and intolerance. Racist individuals are marginalized punks. Racists governments exterminate people by the millions. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00ECGP2Z6/ref=oh _aui_d_detailpage_o06_?ie=UTF8&psc=1 That book gives an accurate picture, captured at the time of the events, of some of the social dynamics that lead to a situation where Hitler could commit genocide. | ||
| Slaughter |
I'm convinced NOBODY has a sense of humor. I suppose it depends on whose ox is being gored. At least oxen can be Kosher and Halal - if properly butchered. | ||
| Oldog |
Beef its whats for supper! | ||
| Bob_thompson |
Did anyone see my statement that I had "a tongue in cheek" while writing my post? I love Slaughters post for its humor and not many here seem to get it, I did and added my own humor but.............nevermind! Carry on with your own ideology, its still a free country. | ||
| Sifo |
RACIST! EDIT:  (Message edited by SIFO on November 13, 2014) | ||
| Ferris_von_bueller |
The Jews left of their own accord up until 1941 when the Nazis prevented any further emigration. | ||
| Blake |
By 1941 there were essentially no more Jewish people left in Germany. Hilarious Steve! | ||
| Pwnzor |
Anybody who didn't see the "article" as nothing more than a joke needs some sensitivity training. A place where they can concentrate... some sort of camp. |
