| Author | Message | ||
     Cityxslicker |
So I have been reading the Marriage woes thread, and there is some inciteful stuff there. We are not all the burly grumpy old bikers that stereotypes want to paint us in ! (thank goodness for that) So why do it>? Why get married ? I have never wanted to, infact I have consciously avoided it at every turn; including the 17 year relationship that just ended (kids, the other thing I will never do) So with the divorce rate so high? the hammer threat of divorce/'community' property, alimony, child support, loss o toys ?... why do it? It seems like the house is stacked in her favor and the odds dont look good. Sure 'never go into a marriage thinking about a divorce'..... years in the military has taught me if you dont have contingencies and exit plans you are dead where you stand. (or simply wish you were) Would I marry a girl ?..... years of experience and past performance tells me NO. but still...... the heart is a fickle foolish thing | ||
| Danger_dave |
My guess is not too many people meet their real soul mate - the true Yin for their Yang. We've never worked at our relationship like all the advice says. Never needed to. Been as one since we met 30 years ago. | ||
| Loki |
its taken 44 years..... on the first day of the new year, I will be gettin hitched. A truly wonderful woman to have by my side. A complete fluke that we ever met. | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
50% of people are unsuitable for marriage. 100% of those who enter marriage believe it's the other 50% who are unsuitable for marriage. Slick, you have successfully identified yourself as unsuitable for marriage. These are not the droids you are looking for. | ||
| Tbowdre |
a shared life seems like a very special thing to me. It holds some real meaning after almost losing it all a couple of years ago i am a lucky man todd | ||
| Cityxslicker |
Ft_Bastard Thanks for the laugh, that is the couples equivelant of half the people you know are below average iq.... and in a normal distribution, mediocre is the new mean .... and its always the 'other' idiots on the road that cant drive ! (me I do fine thank you  ) | ||
| Vampress |
I Never really saw myself as the marrying type either City...  I turned down several proposals over the years, starting at 18 years old, and just didn't see the sense in it. Why bother, why do it, why commit etc??? At 31 I met Lemonchili and within 6 months I had asked him to marry me, he said YES (woot!) and we were married within a year! It still doesn't make sense, it just feels right now is all. I want to share things with him, jokes, travel, gifts, life. In return, he makes me feel loved and safe, supports my silly ideas and creativity and knows I would never do the wrong thing by him. (And I wouldn't) We share some ideas and disagree on others (it's healthy ). He makes me want to be a better person. I don't know why it felt so urgent that I ask, I don't know why he said yes. But I'm sure glad he did  | ||
| Cityxslicker |
apparently the mood around the camp fire from my friends is if you can afford to loose half your stuff, your current accounts, your future pay docked, probably loose the house, and the bikes (3 out ot 8 lost bikes in the divorce mill) Then go for it. If you want real love.... go get a puppy. 'smartest thing you ever did was never get married, never have kids; don't go f8cking up your good luck now' | ||
| Danger_dave |
My Mrs keeps me in the motorcycles to which I have become accustomed. | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
The other way to look at it is losing have your stuff is the price for taking vows with someone without the intent of keeping them. Consider it a breach of contract penalty. If the "partner" in your agreement is someone for which you have misgivings, better to part ways before entering into the contract. Many people have "unity candles" as part of their ceremony. Others have "unite ropes" that are braided together, etc. Want to know what my wife and I had at the center of our marriage ceremony? The signing of the marriage certificate by the preacher, her father and my father. It's the only part of the ceremony that is legally binding but the part that most keep hidden. We believed that the 100 folks present should witness the signing of the "contract". Call them Notary Publics. If you consider yourself as someone who can not sign and keep a contract or unable to judge the character of the other party of the contract, don't enter one. My $.02. | ||
| Boltrider |
City, I'm also a bit of a marriage skeptic. I'm sure marriage can be great, but among family and personal friends, I don't have many positive examples to draw from.
I agree, but too many think they can "change" the person after they get married. That's how it was with my parents, and it didn't turn out so well. | ||
| Iamike |
My wife has told me a couple of times that I have changed since we got married. I replied "No, I still like to do things and have fun." But I don't fault her for becoming a better mother than wife. Maybe some day she'll change back again. | ||
| Oddball |
I still remember Eddie Murphy from long ago..... "Half your S**t!" Adult language in link. (Message edited by oddball on December 27, 2010) | ||
| Fast1075 |
I am from the lifetime batcheler camp. I just never met anybody that I felt like throwing down the "till death do us part" thing.. | ||
| Court |
My Mrs keeps me in the motorcycles to which I have become accustomed. | ||
| Cityxslicker |
In todays political correct climate, I don't think Eddie Murphy RAW would get off the ground.... he would be sued at the end of the show for inflicting emotional damage and distress.... Years in the military, I have trust issues. I don't trust. I run every girl through a background check, and a periodic ever so often; and that is just to date. The last one was more than surprised when she said we were over and she had just found someone else..... Nope, you found him back in October of last year, have been chatting and texting him since, have gone off BC, and started smoking again; do you want the copies of the receipts for your trips, or werent you going to expense those?...... trust issues. | ||
| Oddball |
I think I know city's private eye.  | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
Stop dating hookers and strippers. After a point, all apples must be picked from the ground. | ||
| Just_ziptab |
Love is blind. I was married for 3 years,neart 30 years ago.She,with a 3 yo son from a previous marriage.Neat kid. Lost a few dear toys to keep them happy.........but it was great for the most part, except for one thing. Split personality. Loving house wife one day. Wild high school girl the next..and the trouble that follows that. The divorce cost me a fridge,vacuum sweeper and $400.00 for the lawyer. I was very lucky. She was a 110 pound blond bombshell/F-monster.Long after the divorce,she told me she cheated on me once, but I suspect it was more than once. Now she is a behemoth that entered a nursing home at age 50! I suspect meth. Such a pretty woman that could have amounted to something. So now I am too old (57)and set in my ways to attract another wife. Anyone I am interested in,becomes out of my league. The ones that are interested in me(weird in it's self) remind me of the first wife and it ends before it started. I will die,alone,cold and scared. So be it I guess.....but I lived well and happy. | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
Interested in a lumberjack looking guy in the insurance industry who loves motorcycles in the PNW?  | ||
| Cityxslicker |
That aint right | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
Just looking out for ya man! Look at it this way, you wouldn't really care if he cheated. | ||
| Cityxslicker |
I never dated in highschool I was in three sports, taking college courses, working part time, military reserves, and restoring VW's. I never had the time for it. so of course everyone thought I was gay It is amazing how a stereotype will get started, and twenty years later, at the reunion; not married, no kids.... what, are you gay? no, do I look like I have the wardrobe to be gay?!?! no, now go away. | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
There are gay men who can match clothes for crap. Just sayin'. The problem is that traditionally, folks are married by 30. | ||
| Strokizator |
My grandmother used to tell me "Stay single your whole life and raise your kids the same way." These days that may sound like an endorsement for out-of-wedlock births. | ||
| Luftkoph |
just ziptab Don't we all really die alone? I have to agree with city the marriage contract is stacked in the woman's favor. I don't know why since we have equal rights,the courts act like a woman can't fend for herself without a man to help her and pay for her way. | ||
| Wolfridgerider |
women would have no need of us if they all owned a cat like this.... hey... I just thought it was funny! | ||
| Luftkoph |
now thats some special pussy right there | ||
| Swordsman |
LOL! That cat's like "What? Why are you looking at me like that?" ~SM | ||
| Cityxslicker |
just ran the current girl through the ringer. she didnt pass. Next. |
