| Author | Message | ||
     Swordsman |
Oldie but goodie. ---------------------- A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, 'Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible.' 'What Do you mean?' said the pirate, I feel fine.' Bartender: 'What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before.' Pirate: 'Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now.' Bartender: 'Well, OK, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?' Pirate: 'We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really.' Bartender: 'What about that eye patch?' Pirate: 'Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them crapped in my eye.' 'You're kidding,' said the bartender, 'you lost an eye just from that bird shit?' Pirate: 'What can I tell you...it was my first day with the hook.’ | ||
| Moxnix |
A pirate with a parrot on his shoulder walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Where'd you get that?" The parrot says, "Down at the wharf." | ||
| Sanchez |
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| Ratyson |
So this seal walks into a club... bahdump, spshhhhhhhh... Oops.. sorry... wrong thread. | ||
| Borrowedbike |
National Talk like a pirate day is just a few short weeks away.... (ye scurvy dogs) | ||
| Hmartin |
What does a Dyslexic Pirate Say? RRAAAAAAAAAAA! A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum. The bartender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?" "Arrrrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"  | ||
| Slaughter |
The Corsair Pirate Keyboard:  | ||
| Hmartin |
A pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, the pirate stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a Genie came forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving any thought to the matter the pirate blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into rum!" The Genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest rum ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the Genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of rum on the hull broke the stillness as the two considered their circumstances. The parrot looked disgustedly at the pirate and after a tension-filled moment spoke: "Now yee've done it!! Now we're goon to have to pee in the boat!" | ||
| Ducbsa |
The pirate captain spies an Royal Navy frigate and says to the rookie cabin boy, "Bring me my red shirt!" "Aye-aye, sir, here it is, but why?" "So that if I am injured in the battle, the men won't see the blood and lose heart." They managed to escape, but the next day the captain sees a Royal Navy squadron. "Bring me my brown pants!" | ||
| Sanchez |
> "Arrrrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!"  |
