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Buell Motorcycle Forum » Quick Board Archives » Archive through December 17, 2008 » Dear Santa. « Previous Next »

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Mikethebike72
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 01:27 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. I'v ben a gud boy all yeer.



Yer Friend, Billy

Dear Billy,

Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawncare. How about I send you a book so you can learn to read and spell? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell.

Santa



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Dear Santa,

I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!

Love, Sarah



Dear Sarah,

Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?



Santa



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Dear Santa,

I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do.

Love, Teddy



Dear Teddy,

Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me send you some Legos instead.



Santa



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Dear Santa,

I want a new bike, a Playstation 2, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba.

Love, Francis



Dear Francis,

Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays. I bet you're gay. I'll set you up with a Barbie.



Santa



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Dear Santa,

I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.

Love, Susan



Dear Susan,

Milk gives me the shits and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of Scotch and tell your Mom to wait up.



Santa



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Dear Santa,

What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?

Your friend, Thomas



Dear Thomas,

All the toys are made in China . I have a condo in Vegas where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table.

Hey, you wanted to know.



Santa



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Dear Santa,

Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?

Love, Jessica



Dear Jessica,

Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house.



Santa



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Dear Santa,

I really want a puppy this year. Please, please, please, PLEASE, PLEASE could I have one?

Love, Timmy



Dear Timmy,

That whiney begging shit may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again.



Santa



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Dearest Santa,

We don't have a chimney in our house. How do you get into our home?

Love, Marky



Dear Mark,

First stop callling yourself "Marky", that's why you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, yo u don't live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom window.



Sweet dreams,

Santa
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Wolfridgerider
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 01:41 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom window

LOL
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Ft_bstrd
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 01:41 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

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Cityxslicker
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 01:42 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Dear Santa
I really want a Buell Dirt bike for Super Moto or Dual sport riding, something in the 450cc range
CityXSlicker

WTF, it was worth a shot.
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Ft_bstrd
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 01:46 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Slicker,

You shoulda asked for a unicorn. You might have better luck. : |
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Mikethebike72
Posted on Friday, December 12, 2008 - 02:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Great vid Jeremy.
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