| Author | Message | ||
     Psyclonej |
Do not drink at a bar next to a state mental hospital called the "Recovery Room" DAMHIK | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
A 1970s Mk2 Ford Capri 2.0 GT, needs a release bearing fitting, when replacing the clutch. D A M H I K | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
Must not have been too bad! You were the first to pay your money for our next adventure! I even brought my own eyeball juice.  (Message edited by ft_bstrd on November 28, 2007) | ||
| Buellerandy |
lol! | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
A Volvo cabover tractor with a semi tanker full of bitumen at 180°C WILL go through a gap that's too small for it! D A M H I K | ||
| Buellgirlie |
its not cool to be the lead bike on a corporate demo ride at daytona, and fall over at a stop light because you realized it was going to turn red and not everyone behind you was going to make the turn -- and it was a slightly uphill right-hand turn w/ a taller bike i'd never ridden before..... picked up the bike, and continued to lead a "spirited ride" also gets you yelled at by the service techs on site for taking too much risk... (to my credit, i've NEVER fallen over while riding on the street -- just on the racetrack  ) | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
The English Muffin in Newfieland still makes me giggle whenever I think of it, sorry Mike. | ||
| Wolfridgerider |
You shouldn't sit on the barrel of a 50 cal.M2 while its installed in the gun turret of a AAVP7 and have your crew chief spin you around like its a ride at Disney World..... Platoon Sergeants don't think its funny.... | ||
| Buellerandy |
...or a floor buffer  The cord always seems to catch up with yah... | ||
| Mikef5000 |
...or a floor buffer : ) The cord always seems to catch up with yah... Work in a flooring store long enough, and you'll learn the technique. | ||
| Buellerandy |
I could see maybe if your light enough so your weight doesn't paste the pad right to the floor, causing the buffer itself to spin...but I was 200lbs of sweet love back then. That handle had no choice but to spin:P | ||
| Hexangler |
Do not go for disorganized group rides on narrow mountain roads with riders of greatly different skill levels while there is snow on the ground. Do not let the slowest rider be the last rider of the group. Do not stop and wait until every rider has passed the cattle obstacle. Do not decide that the cattle obstacle now moving into the road will be a problem for the last rider. AND ABOVE ALL>>>Do not turn around and ride back up the blind corner honking your horn to warn last rider--inadvertently exciting Bovinus Obstacleus. D A M H I K (No cattle were injured during this event. Holy Cow!) | ||
| Thumper74 |
Wolf, that sounds like a Beetle Bailey comic strip! I'm not the only person who has ridden a buffer or surfed a pallet jack! | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Ahh pallet truck Grand Prix, we had a figure 8 course with a cross-over between the racks in the central aisle; I'll leave it to your imagination, the crashes that used to occur. Sadly it all came to an end when the warehouse manager got a broken leg from being hit by someone on a pump truck. (well he was about to win the championship so "someone", who had no chance, took him out to let one of his mates win) D A M H I K | ||
| Midnightrider |
- A 4 foot wide, 1000 yard long diesel fuel spill on the highway can be nearly invisible ( although you may be able to smell it) - Diesel fuel can be more slippery than grease on ice - The Hepco-Becker hardbags on a Uly make EXCELLENT (although expensive) sliders - Some Emergency Rooms treat motorcycle accident riders like second-class citizens - If you have a motorcycle accident but wait to be discharged from the Emergency Room until you call your wife for a ride, the best part of your day might have been the motorcycle accident | ||
| Freezerburn |
Wrath of the wife is definitely something to be feared. Do you think you might have fared much better if you called her when you were being triaged? | ||
| Ferrisbuellersdayoff |
Riding lawn mowers left at the curb for the garbage collectors make for great redneck go-carts, getting them home is usually the problem. Don't let your friends ask you to "Just hold the wheels straight." as they tow it up the street to their house. If they do, the second you hear them shift into 2nd gear find the best opportunity to bail. Chances are they intend to hit the other 3 gears too. If said lawn mower go-cart project fails don't put bigger tires on it and let the afore mentioned so called friends tow you through the woods by their 4 wheeler. If your not using a lawn mower, don't use a go cart, power wheels toy, or any kind of wagon, especially the red oned with the wooden sides. D A M H I K | ||
| Ferrisbuellersdayoff |
Principals and Deans disapprove of anything speed or power related: Campus advisors don't approve of making improvments to their golf carts. Drivers ed teachers are the same way! Agriculture teachers don't like to making the goats into race horses. Especially if the goat wins. Janitors don't need more power in their lawn mowers, weed eaters, edgers, leaf blowers, or pressure washers. Commercial floor sanders haul @$$! Chefs club can bring in knives to culinary classes, but I can't bring a welder into shop. Using said welder to cut the boot off an irresponsibly parked car is considered illegal. D A M H I K | ||
| Borrowedbike |
When being pulled along holding onto the tailgate of a pickup truck on snow and ice covered streets, watch for Man hole covers. At speeds above 25 MPH, ensure you are focusing on the vanishing point as you do so, the 14 inches between the bumper of the truck and the toe of your shoe do not provide ample reaction time. When playing with a can of white (Coleman stove) gas, and you poke a pin hole in it's side, it will not burn like a candle if lit. I don't care how persuasive your best friend (fiend?) is, DO NOT light it in a small area such as a treehouse. (Don't ask me, but you can ask Hootowl) | ||
| Rotzaruck |
COLEMAN FUELL!!!OH YEAH!! Also don't slowly pour it onto an already burning yellow jacket nest from an open plastic pail. Don't forget stop drop and roll Fire is so much fun!!! Rotzaruck!!! | ||
| Ulywife |
The Hepco-Becker hardbags on a Uly make EXCELLENT (although expensive) sliders Amen! | ||
| Tom_b |
a 1970 vw beetle will skip across water like a flat stone when deep enough for the tires not to touch bottom and going at 60 plus mph | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
While therein, the visage of one's high school date will be completely obscured by a wall of water and rust when the floorboard of your 1975 VW Beetle finally disintegrates as you drive through standing water at 60MPH. She will also not think it's very funny to have to hold her feet up to keep them from dragging the ground. | ||
| Tq_freak |
Campus security gets very mad when you testing to see how far you can jump the mini Baja car. Especially if it includes clearing a sidewalk bystanders are trying to walk down. (class record 22 feet in the air) An 86 Gmc pickup, even though the speedo only goes to 85 mph, can do way over 100 mph. It is possible to walk 5 miles intoxicated in and hour and a half. If caught doing donuts in the high school or collage or apartment complexes parking lot in the newly fallen snow. Cops don't buy the "I'm just testing the road conditions/ learning how to drive in the snow" excuse. A Chevy blazers speedo is 4 mph fast at 90 mph Said blazer also shuts off at what registers as 115 mph D A M H I K | ||
| Ft_bstrd |
Riding a loose hood from a 1955 ford pick-up being dragged by a log chain attached to the bumper of a 4x4 in a wet cowfield field will result in loss of vision and hearing due to grass seeds being lodged in your upper and lower eyelids and grass hoppers in your ears. | ||
| Xandersam |
Cupcakes splatter on hitchhikers at 60 mph (they hurt too). VW busses really are tail happy. Not all Pintos blow up when subjected to irrational collisions (as opposed to rational ones . Proms really don't mean $hit in hindsight. | ||
| Tom_b |
it is possible for a 150 lb 16 yr old to push his parents 1973 buick electra 2 miles home by himself at 2 A.M. | ||
| Tom_b |
Don't ever say "watch this" after consuming large amounts of alcoholic beverages. | ||
| Etennuly |
A '68 Beetle, at 50 mph, will cut right through a 12' snow drift, as opposed to going over it as planned! Riding a '63 Catalina hood down a snow packed sled run with six of your buddies will result in at least two of them needing stitches! Mountain spring water from a jar mixed carefully with the effervescent fumes of Ben-Gay will make one exclaim "Oh My!", then making one anxious for the next pull on the jar! | ||
| Borrowedbike |
The pads used on the uphill sides of ski lift supports poles make fun sleds, and do not require any effort on the riders part to transport to the top of the hill. The said sleds do not have any means of directional or velocity control. Said sleds do not have handholds. A 10 X 10 pad traveling at a high rate of speed with 4 to 6 passengers becomes airborne when traversing a significant feature of the fall line that increases the angle of decent or provides sufficient lift. Some ski hills are far too steep and long to risk "sledding" down on a "sled" lacking handles, steering mechanism or braking mechanism. Bailing off said sled too early will allow the snowmobile and snow cat "posse" to catch you. Bailing off the said sled too late will deliver you to a lynch mob all to willing to revoke your season pass. Bailing off said sled can very much hurt. It is harder to evade the employees of a ski area once they have turned the lights back on in response to discovering not less than three pad / sleds lying unused at significantly lower elevations than they were when last seen. |
