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Buell Motorcycle Forum » Quick Board Archives » Archive through April 26, 2007 » Finally the guys' rules. « Previous Next »

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Paw
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 - 08:14 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

We have heard and seen the woman rules a lot. Now it is time to see the guys' rules.

Here are the rules from a mans perspective. Finally the guys' side of the story. Ladies these are our rules.

1. Men are are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a
big girl now. If it is up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down, You
don't hear us complaining it is down.

1. Sunday sports. Its like a full moon or
the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one!
Subtle hints do not work.
Strong hints do not work.
Obvious hints do not work
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable
answers to almost every question.

1. A headache that last weeks is a
problem. Go see a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is
inadmissible in a argument, In fact
all comments become null and void
after 7 days.

1. If you think your fat, you might be.
Don't ask us.

1. I am in shape, Round is a shape.

1. If something we said can be
interpreted two ways and one of them
makes you sad or angry, then we meant
the other one.

1. You can ask us to do something or
tell us how you want it done, not both.
and if you already now how best to do
it, then do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible say what you have to
say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need
directions and neither do we.

1. If it itches it WILL be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say
"NOTHING", We will act like nothing's
wrong. We know you are lying, but it
is not worth the hassle, besides we
know you will bring it up later.

1. If you ask a question you don't want
an answer to, expect an answer you
don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, anything
you wear is fine...REALLY IT IS.

1. You have enough cloths

1. You have to many shoes.

1. Thank you for reading this and yes,
I know i have to sleep on the couch
tonight. But we do not mind that its
like camping.

Did you notice how they were all numbered "1" that was done on purpose for a reason. LOL

Hope this made you laugh and if it did not then, I'm sorry.
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Xb9ser
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 - 09:54 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

That was great!!!!!!
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Icon12r
Posted on Tuesday, April 24, 2007 - 10:32 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

Defiantly something all guys can relate to. Props!
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Not_purple_s2
Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 11:55 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

1. If you ask us what we're thinking about and we say "Nothing", it's true.

1. Guys cannot see the colors violet, lavender, mauve, magenta, indigo, or lilac. To us they're all just purple.
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Mr_grumpy
Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 06:36 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

I've done at least half a dozen of those this evening, I'm now just waiting to see if she's asleep before going to bed.
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Al_lighton
Posted on Thursday, April 26, 2007 - 10:08 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only)

On a related note, I just got this in an email:

Men are just happier people.

What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate
is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a
water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station
restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and
think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles
add character. Graying hair adds attraction. Wedding dress~$5000. Tux
rental~$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't
cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone
conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own
jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your
underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than
enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to
see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts
for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You
can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear
shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket
knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do
Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier. Send this to the women who can handle it and to
the men who will enjoy reading it.
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