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Archive 2012 - 2017Crusty1199 41 12-09-17  06:57 am
Archive through April 12, 2020Crusty30 04-12-20  12:06 pm
Archive through March 19, 2020Sami30 03-19-20  02:23 am
Archive through November 11, 201986129squids30 11-11-19  12:08 am
Archive through October 17, 2019Mikethebike7230 10-17-19  07:24 pm
Archive through July 15, 2019Ducbsa30 07-15-19  03:51 pm
Archive through December 08, 2018Crusty30 12-08-18  11:50 am
Archive through November 09, 2018Crusty30 11-09-18  08:27 am
Archive through August 29, 2018Sifo30 08-29-18  11:53 am
Archive through May 19, 2018Griffmeister30 05-19-18  10:53 pm
Archive through February 20, 2018Hootowl30 02-20-18  09:39 am
         

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Sifo
Posted on Tuesday, April 14, 2020 - 09:31 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Sent By an Anonymous UPS Driver


1) Steve: He has been waiting for this moment his whole life. He has been drinking boilermakers since 10:00 am in his recliner and his AR is within arms reach. He has 6 months provisions in the basement and a bug out bag due west buried in the woods. Steve demands a handshake as I give him his package. He's sizing me up as I deliver his ammo. Steve will survive this, and he will kill you if he needs to.

2) Brad: He is standing at his window wearing skinny jeans and a Patagonia t-shirt. He is mad because there were no organic tomatoes at Whole Foods today. He points at the ground where he has taped a 6 ft no go zone line from his porch. I leave his case of Fuji water, organic granola bites, and his new "Bernie Bro" hat at the tape. Brad will not survive. Steve will probably eat him.

3) Nancy: She has sprayed everything with Thieves oil. Bought all the Clorox wipes, hand sanitizer, toilet paper, meat, and bread from the local grocery chain. She has quarantined her kids and sprays them with a mixture of thieves, lavender, & mint essential oils daily. She has posted every link known to man about "The Rona" on her social media. She will spray you if you break the 6 ft rule. I will leave her yet another case of toilet paper. She will last longer than Brad, but not Steve.

4) Karen: She has called everybody and read them the latest news on "The Rona". She asked for the manager at Food Lion, Walmart, Publix, McDonald's, Chi-Fil-A, and Vons all before noon demanding more toilet paper. Karen's kids are currently faking "The Rona" to avoid her. I'm delivering "Hello Kitchen" to her. Karen will not survive longer than Brad.

5) Mary: Is sitting in the swing watching her kids have a water balloon fight in the front yard as she is on her fourth glass of wine. She went to the store and bought 2 cases of pop tarts, 6 boxes of cereal, 8 bags of pizza rolls, And a 6 roll pack of toilet paper. There is a playlist of Bob Marley, Pink Floyd, and Post Malone playing in the background. I'm bringing her second shipment of 15 bottles of wine in 3 days. Mary will survive and marry Steve. Together they will repopulate the earth.
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Aesquire
Posted on Thursday, April 23, 2020 - 01:08 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

https://9gag.com/gag/a7wjYDw

Australian Senator proving that ours are not unique in their brilliance.
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Pwnzor
Posted on Thursday, April 23, 2020 - 02:02 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

LOL... I had seen her before, she's the female Hank Johnson!
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Tootal
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 10:48 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Wow, I would consider her a joke too!
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Pwnzor
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 10:50 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

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Tootal
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 11:08 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Makes you Georgia proud doesn't he!!
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Pwnzor
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 11:23 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

He continually gets reelected.

Georgia is a pretty big state, with less population than Los Angeles County.

A. Lot. Of. The. People. Here. Are. Dumb. As. Rocks.
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Hootowl
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 11:35 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Here’s a man who cannot summon the word ‘width’. He sounds about as knowledgeable as just about any other democrat on any given subject. You should listen to their gun control arguments. It would be funny, if they weren’t trying to subvert the constitution.
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Sami
Posted on Friday, April 24, 2020 - 03:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

I saw two guys wearing matching clothing and I asked if they were gay. They quickly arrested me.
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Aesquire
Posted on Saturday, April 25, 2020 - 05:42 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

short quarantine fight video
https://9gag.com/gag/aO7oQpD
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Hootowl
Posted on Thursday, May 14, 2020 - 12:19 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

What did Einstein’s wife say when he finished his special theory of relativity?

It’s about time.
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Aesquire
Posted on Thursday, May 14, 2020 - 09:44 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

https://9gag.com/gag/azmLWnz
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Aesquire
Posted on Thursday, May 14, 2020 - 10:13 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

https://9gag.com/gag/aD4wqxZ

love fireworks!

Darwin level
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Ratbuell
Posted on Friday, May 22, 2020 - 09:57 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Due to the current upset situation caused by the Corona Virus in the economy, the Democrats have decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Democrats to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Democrats deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Democrats .

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much **** (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Democrats has always prided themselves on the amount of **** they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough ****, please bring this to the attention of your Democrat Congressman or woman , who has been trained to give you all the **** you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)



PS - Due to recent budget cuts by Democrats as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
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Oldfartnbuell
Posted on Friday, May 22, 2020 - 10:08 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

Oh My!! looks like I am in deep ****!
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Hootowl
Posted on Saturday, June 13, 2020 - 01:36 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP Print Post    Move Post (Custodian/Admin Only) Ban Poster IP (Custodian/Admin only)

A male crab met a female crab at a party.
He knew it was love so he asked her to marry him.
She had noticed that he walked straight and not sideways like all the others.
Thinking he was definitely special, she agreed.
The next day she sees him walking sideways and asked what happened.
He says, Well I can’t drink like that every day.
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