| Author | Message | ||
     Doughnut |
Not leaving EVERYTHING. Just stuff like the bedroom set, I really don't need it, or the monster computer desk. Stuff like that. I survive. | ||
| Naughtynurse |
Doughnut, Since I know you , and know what you have been going through for the last few months with house hunting and bike selling etc..my thoughts are with you!! Ditto what Buellgirlie said...you will get through all of this and you will be a much stronger person!!! And hearts mend!! | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Doughnut, Newfie's not kidding, only down side is the riding season's even shorter than there! Here's a different idea though, go get your truck drivers licence, & hit the road, lots of advantages, place to live (truck), interesting job, lots of travel, spot roads you want to go back & ride, job security , you'll never need to worry about getting a job there's a worldwide shortage of truck drivers. + you get paid, & you can sing to the radio all day long with nobody to complain. (this is all from personal experience when my 1st marriage went pop) Don't get too down, every cloud has a silver lining , as the saying goes. Funny thing about all those sayings, one door..., ...darkest before dawn..., etc etc etc, they're mostly true. I'd happily lend you a bike to ride too, but I think it's probably a trifle too far from you. All the best. Of course if you learned to speak French........ | ||
| Buellgirlie |
Doughnut, just noticed in your profile that you're "local". c'mon up to milwaukee one of these days, and i'll let you take a spin on one of my bikes (if its not salted all to hell on the roads like it is now) and buy ya (non-ramen noodle non 99 cent menu) dinner too. D | ||
| Doughnut |
JUST GOT HOME. WENT OUT TO DRINK WITH A FRIEND TO VENT AND TALK. nOTE FROM DARCEY THAT SHE WAS WORRIED AND WENT TO MY JOB TO SEE IF i WAS OK! wHAT THE ••••• (time = 12:45 AM) The Bird (African Grey) seems to be missing me aready. She (the bird) hase never been so affectionate. (Message edited by Doughnut on February 20, 2006) | ||
| Dana P. |
Nope Doughnut I'm not the annony poster. I say this,your job search has just broadened to nation wide and you can go at a drop of a hat. Or you can wait this one out and see if she come back to you. Both choices that only you can make. Time is a healer and it'll get better. Dana | ||
| Blake |
Anony post removed.  | ||
| Sandblast |
Anony poster was me Doughnut, not sure if you saw it or not. Sorry Blake- I didnt think I was outside the spirit of the rule, I wont try it again though. Rules is rules. Hope your feeling better Nut. If you did'nt see my post I was just saying there are a lot of fish in the sea and to take advantage of your new freedom, rather than feeling bad about it. But I said it in a jerk way then posted anony so my wife would'nt beat me up.  } (Message edited by sandblast on February 20, 2006) | ||
| Doughnut |
Venting. . . It hurts that she seems so much happier now. She bought me a book that she thougt I would like yesterday. I already have it. I asked her why she was buying me things, and that it would make things harder. She got angry with me. She does not seem sad, hurt or anything, just happy. Makes me feel that I must really be a •••• up if leaving me is that liberating. I thought about the casual sex thing. I would feel bad about it afterwards,(sound like a woman, don't I). Got to decide, do I try to buy a little house, or do I get an apartment. Need to figure out bed, chairs, dishes, and all that stuff as well. Keep telling myself, just gotta get the PD job and it will all work out, nothing I can do about the job though but wait for the call. Again, thank you all. I build my world and my life around Darcey, and really have no one else to talk to or get comfort from. Someday I hope that I am able to repay you all. | ||
| Crusty |
Donut, twelve years ago, I was in a similar place. My wife left, taking my daughter with her, I got laid off, and could not find a job, and I couldn't pay my mortgage or my bills. Times were very tough for a while. But everything changes with time. I'm married to a wonderful woman who loves me, we have a small house, and my daughter lives with us. And I'm building machines that float on a cushion of air. Things are going to get better, probably in ways you would never imagine. Everything comes to pass; nothing comes to stay. | ||
| Bcordb3 |
Jon, hang strong! You are doing the right thing, talking with the folks on this site. Getting out will ease your pain. You will realize that there is no pain at all. I am sure that many of us here have been similar situations. I know I have. In my younger days I was a merchant seaman, my (then) wife met me at the bottom of the gangway of the ship I was on to pick me up and dropped the (D) bomb on me. Of course she had our 3 year old child with her. I thought I was angry and very hurt. In time I realized it was a pride issue on my part. You mention that you want to become a policeman. I don't have to tell you that be careful with your dealings with your ex-girl friend. If she calls the cops on you, you are finished as far as getting any police job. You mention repaying everyone here, I will tell you, brother, you don't owe me anything. I (we) are here to help each other out of things like this. God Bless | ||
| Doughnut |
She and I are on ok terms, she dosen't hate me, (I hope). Would never harm her. Sucks, at the Police & Fire Commission they asked me of my greatest accomplishment that I was most proud of. I replied that it was my relationship with my fiancee'. Dropped the ball on that one I guess. | ||
| Blake |
"I thought about the casual sex thing. I would feel bad about it afterwards,(sound like a woman, don't I)." I would say that you are a man of high character, respect, and solid principal. I salute you! Not to mention that in general a woman who would engage in that kind of promiscuous behavior is not worth your personal investment. Not to mention the whole STD scenario. Not to mention the whole unwanted child-birth issue. I agree. If she wants to break up, then it needs to be clean. There is no amicable break up in my opinion. Doesn't mean it needs to be hateful or combative either, but the break should be clean. ANY further contact will be hurtful. Hang tough, and count yourself as your own best friend. You look out for you instead of her for a change.  | ||
| Dullorb |
The whole point of a one night stand is not to have a personal investment. And there are plenty precautions that can eliminate most of the risks of STDs like AIDS or babies but donut's to much of a puss to do it. It would be nice if it could be clean but it won't be no matter what, right now I have to slap some sense into him about the engagement ring but the night is young an he is still sober I may crack him yet, prolly not tonight though. He's a take the band-aid off slow type. Now he's bitching at me for misrepresenting his ring issue so I got to go git him lickered up. We're going to relive the glory days when we could have been long haul truckers. | ||
| Doughnut |
Love you too Dull. | ||
| Dullorb |
Go to sleep. | ||
| Dullorb |
I'm not going into detail but I now have an engagement ring shaped impression in my right shoulder. Who would have guessed diamonds are so hard? | ||
| Buellgirlie |
just to clarify... the dinner offer was in the spirit of badweb friendship, just like i'm offering to help where i can with vegasbueller and sammie at bikeweek next week. the bike offer was because i saw the other post where he sold his bike and i saw how well taken care of it was. i do not lend my bikes out normally. i've met some good folks on badweb, and am just trying to extend a helping hand and friendly face in times of distress. i thought of it originally when mackay offered a hot meal at his house D | ||
| CJXB |
I agree. If she wants to break up, then it needs to be clean. There is no amicable break up in my opinion. Doesn't mean it needs to be hateful or combative either, but the break should be clean. ANY further contact will be hurtful. Excellent, excellent advice !! CJ | ||
| Mikej |
If you're up in the air about getting a house or apartment then look into local monthly rates at hotels/motels. I know when I first moved here to WIsconsin the Select Inn in Brookfield had monthly rates that were comparable to apartment monthly rates. Next option is to rent an apartment or studio flat on a month-to-month basis. Get a P.O. box while you still have the current address, that way you'll have a set place to get mail until things settle down and won't have to keep sending in change of address forms. Just some thoughts to consider. | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
Hey Dull, Donut, what's this coulda been truckers business, you're a pair of young puppies at 29, I'm 46 & still at it, If you want it go get it! It can be a hard life but a good one, there's nothing gives me the same buzz a chucking a fully freighted rig down the road. It'll get easier Doughnut, this is the hardest part, you'll keep asking yourself " what'd I do wrong?" well there's no hard & fast answer I'm afraid, time will take care of it though. A lot of us have been through this, & believe me we feel your pain, you're not alone. | ||
| Sandblast |
Buellgirlie- I'm sure that is the way everybody saw it, I dont think anyone thought any different. You seem like a nice person. | ||
| Thin_air |
First, MOVE OUT! Staying on the couch will only prolong things. I have been there and it sucks. Second, always remember that you were looking for a woman when you found this one. Third, dont base your personal happiness on a •••••• job! If you are qualified, you will get hired. If you arent getting hired there GO SOMEWHERE ELSE! (I always hear about LAPD hiring), get a job as a LEO and it will be easier to find a more desirable job. It is always easier to get a job when you have one. Being where youre at sucks, its temporary. Move on brother... | ||
| M1combat |
I agree there... If you're living on her couch move. Stuff a few pairs of pants/shirts into a backpack and stay on a friend's couch. It's a lot better for your mental health that way. | ||
| Dullorb |
He says he doesn't like staying over because my couch is lumpy. Wait, no he says I'm lumpy, my couch is too short for him. For the record Donut's feeling a little better now but still has a lot of things to take care of. --PS Grumpy, the trucker thing has never been entirely ruled out. | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
I love the smell of Diesel smoke in the morning!  | ||
| Mr_grumpy |
This is a period of opportunity, You're young, You're healthy, The world is the mollusc of your choice! | ||
| Newfie_buell |
Mollusc?????? That Grumpy guy is scary at times? | ||
| Doughnut |
As the Doughnut turns! The latest in my drama. I have found a house that I like a lot, it is at the limit of my pre-approval. I am going to give my realtor the house info. tommorow so she can check it out, I am also going to my bank to see exactly what I need to do. This is the first thing to make me happy in a while. This plus the PD job would give me a whole new start!  | ||
| Garrett1998s1 |
Good Luck hope it works out. |
